An archived post of April Reflections

Here we are in April already! The days do seem to fly by sometimes.

I’m presently the organizer of a Meetup group in the Los Angeles area called “Wholesome Queers”

I didn’t create the group or name it, but the creator asked if I’d take it over when he chose to embark on a new adventure on the East Coast. But it has proven to be a very popular name. We are nearly up to 1200 members now – though I should be quick to say that most will probably never show up for an event… tis the way of Meetup groups, and I belong to groups myself to which I’ll never actually show up for more than a stray event. But the Wholesome Queer events are well attended. It has truly been an honor to spend time with such a diverse group of people. I’ve learned a lot, and there honestly has not been a single person in the group I’ve not enjoyed meeting and am richer for even the slight acquaintance.

Much has been written of what is called an epidemic of loneliness in our times. I don’t think it is just the US. It seems to be connected to the changing economics in the world. People leave home and try to make their way… perhaps they find a romantic partner… maybe they don’t. Sometimes people by desire or need live a great distance from their families and don’t feel support from those quarters. But I don’t think that this is endemic to our age. People have been moving elsewhere to find work from the beginning of recorded history. And loneliness is perhaps part of a normal cycle of being human. We all feel lonely at times. Whether partnered or not. Even in the midst of a big family and many loved ones, we all have times when we feel alone. We can label it a bad thing, or we can choose to see it as a reflective period… a time to consider what we want our days to be like. Where do we need to make change? What do we need to appreciate more?

Life is a craft project. To some extent we can choose to change our circumstances IF they warrant change. If you want more friends you need to step outside your front door and meet people who share your interests. Even if you have an obscure interest like underwater basket-weaving, it is not impossible that someone in your community also wants to give it a go. There is much to be said for actively creating a life that you want to live. Finding something that you love to do is always a great place to start.